Six Thoughts Bringing You Down (and How You Can Correct Them)

This is the first in a two-part resource article. The second part has six more thoughts.

By Rachel Amity, MSW Candidate, U-M Athletic Counseling Team

Have you ever caught yourself thinking about things in a way that makes you feel sad, frustrated, or less confident? Many of us slip into ways of thinking that make us feel unsure of our abilities. These types of thoughts are called cognitive distortions. They trick us into thinking and feeling that certain things are true, even if those thoughts and feelings aren’t supported by facts. Below is a list of some of the most common distortions, how they might be affecting your life, and what you can do about them.

Cognitive Distortions Take Home Sheet (PDF)

1. All-or-nothing thinking

You see things in black-or-white categories. If a situation falls short of perfect, you see it as a total failure. Your performance was either totally good or totally bad.

Ex: You lost the first set of a match, and now you tell yourself that the whole match is a lost cause, even though there is still time to win.
Ex: You get a C on your midterm, higher than the average, but you expected to get an A. You can still get an A- in the class, but you see your midterm grade as a sign you have failed the course.


2. Overgeneralization

You see a single negative event, such as a match loss or an injury, as a never-ending pattern of defeat by using words such as “always” or “never” when you think about it.

Ex: You go on a date and have a good time, but they don’t ask you on a second date. You then come to the conclusion that you will never find a partner or be in a relationship.
Ex: You failed your last math exam, therefore you come to the conclusion that you will never be good at math.


3. Catastrophizing and Minimization

You exaggerate the importance of your problems and shortcomings, and/or you minimize the importance of your desirable qualities.

Ex: You are worried you will fail your upcoming exam; you catastrophize this event and believe if you do fail, you will never be successful.
Ex: As a senior, you want to be a leader for your team. However, you’ve been experiencing some pain during practices and feel you won’t be able to lead anymore if you get injured. You fail to see that your ability to communicate with your team will make you a valuable leader no matter what.


4. Filtering

You filter out and discount positive information, pick out a negative detail and dwell on it exclusively. In other words, you notice your failures, but don’t see your successes.

Ex: You feel as though one of your friends has been upset with you because you haven’t been studying together every night like you did last month. However, you overlook the fact that they invited you to dinner and to watch a movie this weekend and they were happy to have you there.
Ex: You usually submit your assignments on time, but you turned this assignment in late. You focus on this one instance as a sign that you are unable to keep up with course work.


5. Personalization

Personalization occurs when you hold yourself personally responsible for an event that isn’t entirely under your control, or when you blame other people for something that was (at least partially) your fault.

Ex: You missed an extra point after a touchdown on Saturday, and the team lost – you can’t help but feel as though you would have won if you had just made that extra point, even though the whole team struggled; you begin to blame yourself for the loss.
Ex: You have a group project in one of your classes this semester. You missed the last two group meetings because you wanted to catch up with friends and take a nap. Your group turned in the first part of the project last week, and you got a lower grade than you wanted. You blame your group members for the grade, even though you could have attended the meetings and contributed to the group more.


6. Disqualifying the Positive

You reject positive experiences by insisting they “don’t count.” If you do a good job, you may tell yourself that it wasn’t good enough or that anyone could have done as well.

Ex: You’re lifting more during workouts. You ignore the strength and conditioning improvements because you still feel your game performance could be better.
Ex: You have a presentation in class and you do you well enough to get an A on it. However, you discount this grade thinking that everyone else in the class probably got an A also, maybe even an A+, you just got lucky.


Read Six More Thoughts Bringing You Down (and How You Can Correct Them).


What to do

Did some of those sound familiar? Take a moment to reflect on the times that you may have found yourself thinking in these ways. Did it change your feelings, emotions, or ability to perform academically, socially, or physically? If so, you are not alone. These cognitive distortions are common, but in their more extreme forms, they can be harmful to our well being. Luckily, there are a few steps you can take to help recognize them and reduce the harm they cause.

Notice your feelings.
How are the thoughts going through your head making you feel? What emotion am I having? What did I notice in my body?

Are the thoughts helpful?
What are you responding to? What did those thoughts, images, or memories say about this situation?

Search for evidence.
What evidence do you have that supports the thought you’re having? What facts provide evidence against the unhelpful thoughts?

Find alternatives
What would someone else say about this situation? What advice would you give to someone else who was going through this? Is there another way to think about this?

Distract
Change your situation or do something to stop the thought. Recognizing that thoughts come and go, we can choose to pay attention and hold onto them, or to let them go. Sometimes by doing something different, it helps let go of the thought more quickly, and therefore, it will have less chance to impact the way you feel and perform.


Additional Resources

Athletes Connected Get Support Page

U-M Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS)

Campus Mind Works – U-M website supporting student mental health

The New Gameplan: How to Transition from High School to College

By Jevon Moore, Athletics Counseling Intern/Mental Health Outreach Coordinator

Your coach yells, “Timeout!” and the ref immediately follows with a loud blow of the whistle. Your team gathers on the sideline with the coaches for one last time.

There’s 1:48 on the clock and you get a shot of water and take a deep breath. Your coaches are all talking and pacing back and forth hoping you understand how important it is to be calm and to remember what you practiced. The whistle blows again and the other team slowly gathers back on the field.

You have fought your way back into the game after a slow start and the momentum has begun to shift back to your team. You know it. Your team knows it. Every individual in the stands knows it. The entire crowd stands in anticipation for an exciting finish that will end in glory or hard fought defeat.

The key to success is very similar to your path to athletic success; preparation and practice

Everyone from your mailman to your dentist is in the crowd screaming their heads off in support. Your breathing is slow but your heart is pumping with a little extra thump as you prepare for the play to begin.

A few quick memories run through your head as you find your spot. You start to remember those early mornings with the team, that diet you started, and of course that extra rep in the weight room; they all were for this moment. Will you channel all your preparation and beat back that voice in your head wondering if you have what it takes? Or do you fall victim to the moment and watch the other team dump ice on their coach’s head?

Fast forward: Now you’re in college. You’ve made it. You are miles away from everything you knew so well back home and you started a new chapter in your life. This journey you’re on and all the hard work you did while in high school has given you the opportunity to play sports in college. So why do you feel lost and confused? This is everything you wanted and dreamed about, but now that you are here something doesn’t feel right.

The coach that you were excited to work with doesn’t seem to get you. Your teammates are not as supportive and friendly as you imagined. The campus is way bigger than the pictures showed and your professors all seem to be speaking a foreign language in class. Things continue to move a little faster and before you get the chance to get comfortable with your surroundings you are hit with your first set of mid-terms. But wait, your coach is also telling you they will be testing everyone to determine your role on the team this week.  What just happened?

You quietly sit on your bed and yearn for the good old days where your support network of family, friends, coaches, and teammates all knew how to get you out of a funk. But that’s in the past and you sit alone now in a dorm with a roommate you just met a month ago and you’re not sure who to talk to. Your chest is starting to get tight and your heart is thumping like the game is on the line. There is a thick cloud of fog in your head and the more you try to think of what to do the thicker the cloud gets.

“Timeout!”

Let’s take a Zac Morris break and get a handle on the situation. If you’re aren’t aware of Zac Morris and his life-pausing “timeouts” during the show Saved by the Bell, then do yourself a favor and add that to your binge watching list on the weekend. But seriously, there are some simple ways that you can get control of your life again.

First, let’s get a feel for what’s different now that you’re playing a college sport:

  • New coaches with a range of varying coaching styles
  • New practice and training times that are a little more intense than high school
  • New teammates and personalities to navigate which make you wonder, “who can I trust?”

This is completely normal. We have all been there. As a student-athlete, we have all walked on campus as a first-year athlete with our eyes wide open going from class to practice to study hall then to bed wondering where the day went. The key to success is very similar to your path to athletic success; preparation and practice. You learn the skills, practice them for mastery, and then trust in your training.

So, let’s teach you a few skills.

It Starts with Me
Anxiety doesn’t always hit you from the side and knock you clean off your feet. It can sometimes just feel like a fog. No matter the degrees or amount of fog, take a second to recognize what is happening inside you. The key to making a big play is knowing when to make it. So take time to recognize the moments when your body is feeling weird. Jot down notes if you’re a list maker or just make a mental note. Either way, the better you get at identifying the feelings when they start, the faster and more efficient you can be at getting yourself back into prime form.

Scheduled “Worry” Time
Now that we know when we usually start worrying or have an idea of what causes our worry, let’s make time for it in our schedule. Set aside a block of time in your day to give in to the beast you have been fighting every day. See the trouble with anxiety is that it feels like a day long struggle but it’s probably only a few thoughts on repeat that keep bugging you. That’s why we set aside time to let it all pour in.

Every negative thought that exists below the surface about being a new kid on campus. Every worry you have about not being able to keep up with school or compete with your new team needs to be explored. Once you have turned the flashlight on all the areas of that dark cave, we call anxiety, then start over. Set aside ten minutes, then worry for ten minutes straight with no shortcuts or relief. Once your time is up, climb your way out of that cave and let’s spend some time outside in the sun.

Now That Feels Good
We’ve just given into the worry and we want to move on with our day, but first let’s take some calming breaths to reset our mind and body. Just like at the end of a game you need a minute to relax in the locker room before facing the world and this breathing technique should give your body time to adjust. Before starting, make sure you are somewhere you can be comfortable and safe to close your eyes and relax.

Distractions during this time can throw you off and make it hard for your body to fully relax. So put the phone in airplane mode or, if that hurts too much, lay it in another room. Get comfortable and let’s take a deep breath in through our nose counting to four slowly. Hold the air in your lungs for at least 4 seconds allowing the air to fill your lungs completely. Once you get to four, breathe out slowly counting to six to empty all of the air from your chest. Continue this cycle at least four times or until you can consciously feel your body release all that negativity.

You should now be refreshed and to some degree prepared to take on your next challenge. If this isn’t the case try finding a quieter, more remote place to do your breaths. The key isn’t to rush through this, but instead to give in to it completely.

There are more coping skills and resources for dealing with anxiety here just in case this didn’t do it for you. In any case, don’t fight with this alone. There are resources available that can help you find peace, and sometimes it takes an outside voice to talk our brain into complete buy-in.

Remember, just like before the big moment when the game is on the line and everyone is watching, you took time to train and study and practice your skills. So don’t wait until your worries get out of control to test them out. Take time now, call a timeout, and make a plan. The more prepared you are for the moment the better you will perform.  


About the Author
Jevon Moore is an MSW candidate working as an intern with the Performance Psychology and Athletic Counseling team. In this role, Jevon works with the athletic counselors to assist in providing a full spectrum of care and services for student-athletes ranging from performance concerns to everyday emotional stressors. In addition to clinical care and support, Jevon consults with coaches and student-athlete support staff such as dieticians, academic counselors, doctors and trainers to ensure the most integrative care possible.

Jevon is originally from North Carolina having played football at North Carolina State University in Raleigh. As an undergraduate student he majored in Industrial Engineering focusing on systems management and cost reduction practices. Read “Passion, purpose and a love story” to learn more about Jevon’s journey in helping mental health awareness and support.


Additional Resources

Six Tools to Help Fight College Freshman Depression

Athletes Connected Get Support Page

U-M Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS)

Campus Mind Works – U-M website supporting student mental health

MGoBlue: Messages of Hope-Doing Something to Stop Student Suicide

Steve Kornacki of MGoBlue.com covered the Messages of Hope board unveiling on Sept. 15. Below is an excerpt.


By Steve Kornacki

Garrick Roemer used to love running on the track at the University of Michigan’s iconic Ferry Field and walking across the service street to the Ross Academic Center. He ran the hurdles and was on a sprint relay for the Wolverines, and he was living a dream as a kid who grew up just a few miles south of campus in Saline.

Then, on May 4, 2014, his life and all of those dreams ended. Roemer, still four months away from his 20th birthday, died by suicide.

Sorrow came so suddenly for his family, friends and teammates. Grief pervaded the campus and his hometown. Over time, his family received heartfelt compassion and heard so many positive stories about Garrick from countless people, many of whom they’d never spoken with before, that it drove them to do something that could make a difference where suicide is concerned.

“It really is a time for us to wake up to the fact that this is an issue — that people need help.”

— U-M Athletic Director Warde Manuel

“Garrick liked people to be connected,” said his mother, Cathy Radovich. “One of his teammates said he was the glue that connected people. And the people that I’ve connected with since his death are really because of Garrick. He is bringing me to all of these other people that I’m meeting and helping.

“So, he’s still helping people. But it’s just through me. If I can honor him that way, that’s what I will do.”

She and other family members, including Garrick’s father, Ronald Roemer, have funded something that they hope not only carries on Garrick’s loving, compassionate spirit but also provides solace and resources for those considering suicide. Their Messages of Hope board was officially unveiled Friday (Sept. 15), in the middle of National Suicide Awareness Month, along the main corridor of the Ross Academic Center.

Wolverines athletic director Warde Manuel addressed the gathering of well over 100 and said that while it was a “celebration” of Garrick and the Messages of Hope board, as well as a time to share thoughts, it was more than that, too.

“It really is a time for us to wake up to the fact that this is an issue — that people need help,” said Manuel, who has a social work background.

He noted data detailing a 24 percent increase in suicide over the last 15 years and added that a golfer who was at Michigan while Manuel was playing football and participating in track and field 30 years ago recently committed suicide.

Afterward, I asked Manuel what made this topic so personal and special to him.

“We often talk about being a family,” Manuel said of the athletic department. “And because we are a family, we care. And we have family members in our midst in athletics who need our love and support and who are considering and thinking about suicide more than we know.


Read the rest of the story on MGoBlue.com.

Six Tools to Help Fight College Freshman Depression

The U-M Health Blog has published a post about tools for college freshmen to fight depression. Below is an excerpt.


The start of college comes with expectation and excitement, but it also can trigger depression. A Michigan Medicine psychiatrist offers advice to ease the transition.

By Kevin Joy

Making the leap from high school to college is a big deal, no matter how far from home a soon-to-be freshman is headed.

“People really need to know it’s OK to ask for help.”

But the positive (yet often hectic) milestone can shake a student’s well-being, with unintended effects such as depression.

“It’s a huge transition for everyone, whether you have a history of depression or not,” says Dayna LePlatte, M.D., a clinical instructor in psychiatry at the University of Michigan Medical School. “You’re living on your own, taking on more responsibility and academic demands.

“It can be tough.”

And it marks a key time for signs of trouble to surface: 75 percent of mental health conditions begin before age 24, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness.

Nor is the scenario uncommon. A 2016 UCLA survey found that 12 percent of college freshmen say they are frequently depressed. Likewise, the number of students seeking mental health services rose nearly 30 percent between 2009 and 2014, a Penn State University survey found.

Although some self-help steps can offer an emotional boost — see a list of tips below — a student showing symptoms of depression shouldn’t struggle alone.

Says LePlatte, a former psychiatrist for U-M student-athletes: “People really need to know it’s OK to ask for help.”

She offered advice for freshmen and their families.


Read the rest of the blog post.

5 Ways to Put Your Wellbeing First

Read the original story from SwimSwam.com:


By Emily Brunemann

1) VALUE YOURSELF
When you value yourself at the very core your self-esteem increases. Through this you must treat yourself with kindness and respect. Everyone makes mistakes; everyone fumbles along their life journey. Better understanding that this is normal and not over criticizing yourself allows for growth, allows for you to learn from mistakes and move forward in life. Here’s a little video of a little girl who has mastered this:

2) STOP AND SMELL THE ROSES
Take time for yourself, enjoy a hobby, walk through the park, drink coffee on the porch while listening to the birds chirp, or get a massage. Removing technology for moments through the day and listening to the sounds around us allows for reflection, mindfulness, and mediation. These are all important in our ever-busy lives. Enjoying leisure activities can reduce stress, increase positive emotions, distract us from difficulties, and even build our confidence. If you do not stop to notice the positives in your life, it’s like they barely exist. Unfortunately, our daily demands sometimes block our ability to savor these moments. Take the time, savor it, enjoy it, live it.

3) DO SOMETHING FOR OTHERS
Doing good for others can make you feel good as well. Putting energy into others may remind you that you’re relatively lucky, it might make you feel connected to others, maybe it will help you feel needed, it may effectively take your mind off your own worries for a while, it can make you feel generous and/or add a sense of purpose and meaning to your life. Whatever the reason or feeling you have for doing something for others it has been proven to have a positive impact on your mental and emotional health. There are always ways to get involved, to help others, to give back.

4) CREATE JOY, LOVE, AND HAPPINESS WITHIN YOUR LIFE
Studies have shown that laughing decreases pain, it can help your heart and lungs, it promotes muscle relaxation and can dramatically reduce anxiety. Positive emotions can decrease stress and build emotional resiliency. We don’t always need to add new activities to get more pleasure in our life. Remembering number 2 above can also help. Here are some tips to help find joy in your life.

Mindfulness: Being mindful means being fully aware of yourself and your surroundings. If you think about it like having a meal, being mindful means feeling the textures, tasting the flavors, enjoying the aromas, don’t rush and stay present. This is one example of a mindful experience there are many others to enjoy throughout the day.

Share the joy: When you have an exciting or positive experience share it with someone else, tell a friend about it. That way you’ll get to relive the moment again.

Let it out: When you’re feeling good, throw your whole self into it. Go ahead, jump up and down, clap your hands, who cares what others think, remember value yourself. Research shows that if you act out a certain emotion, you can fire up that feeling.

5) TALK TO SOMEONE
There is still a stigma around counseling, talking to others about stressors going on, or feeling the need to tough out the struggles. Guess what, EVERYONE struggles at some point and typically more than once in their life.


If you or someone you know is feeling bad or suicidal, there is help available right away. You can call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to reach a 24-hour crisis center or dial 911 for immediate assistance.

However, you don’t have to be in crisis to seek help. Why wait until you’re really suffering? I am a firm believer in a preventative model. Learning positive coping skills, building your self confidence, and quite frankly understanding yourself better can help in most all aspects of life.

  • Help with solving problems: remember the quote two heads are better than one
  • They can help you discover strength in the face of obstacles
  • Everyone has behaviors we want to change and they can help you acknowledge and work through those changes
  • Help you understand yourself better, many times we are blinded
  • They can help heal pains from your past
  • Not only help you figure out your goals but help you work to achieve them
  • Self-confidence is the driving factor in many aspects of life, they can help you build it, maintain it, and strengthen it
  • Most importantly just being present to hear and see you